there isn't anyone left under the moonlight besides the two of them. then again, there weren't too many people present to begin with. their life had always seem to be just for them.swaying barefoot in the grass with nothing but the night sounds of the countryside in the background, gahyeon presses her cheek against his chest, and adds the sound of his heartbeat to the anthem of their day. the hand on his back is gentle in its slow movements between his shoulder blades, and the one in his hand refuses to let go."i love you always, husband."❁it's much too late at night when they show up at her door, somber faces already telling her more than words could. when she had awoken, their shared bed was empty. what else could they be here for? why else would they be looking at her like that. why else would her body already be forcing the tears out. the news brings her to her knees."we're so sorry for your loss, miss."the first time she throws up is right before his funeral. she chalks this up to nerves and that twisting feeling in her gut replacing what used to be love.it isn't until two days later when she's hugging the toilet again does she realize. she's missed her period.❁hour five.
her father rushes in at the sound of a plate breaking, followed by an outcry. and, sure, gahyeon being loud is nothing out of the ordinary, but steady hands rarely lets anything break. he finds her in the kitchen, one hand gripping the counter, the other a chair."is it time to go?"her water breaks, and he tries not to think about what kind of damage that'll do to the wooden floors."WHAT DO YOU THINK?""okay, okay, i'll get my coat."the last time he was in the hospital for a birth, his wife died. that won't happen this time, he thinks, pressing on the accelerator at the sound of another cry and curse. he tries to calm her down, the contents of the glove box being pulled in to circle around her hard to miss. she, on the other hand, thinks she has the right to be as un-calm as she damn well pleases, and he can have an opinion on the matter when there's a watermelon trying to come out of his orifices.hour thirteen.
gahyeon has been pacing around the room for half an hour, both hands behind her to brace the weight. there is very little hate in her heart, but she's starting to think labor is the absolute worst thing she's been through, the physical pains of it all shadowing the past emotional hurts life has brought."come on, baby... you can do this. it's time to come out. your father and i are punctual people, you know? so let's get you in the habit of being more timely, too."on cue, by some cruel twist of fate, she has another contraction."oh, you little bastard -- that was so rude. you're grounded. you hear me? you are officially grounded until you're 5 years old."hour twenty.
"you did not seriously just walk into this room with food."he freezes in place, wide, clueless eyes meeting glaring, exhausted ones. how could he forget -- pregnant women can't eat while in labor."get out."hour twenty-nine.
after three hours of pushing, a healthy, pink baby boy (and a little bit of poop) finally leaves her body. he's handed to her in a soft green towel. she doesn't even realize she's crying, beaming down at him with a gentle finger tracing his face."hi, baby. i promise... i promise, i'm not gonna let anything bad happen to you."❁"how come i only have one grandpa? everyone in school has so many grandpas...""oh, yeah? how many do they have? well, you have two grandmas and two grandpas, but grandpa lee is the only one who's here.""where are the others?""well... they're in heaven. grandma lee passed away when i was baby, and your father's parents passed away when he was a baby.""is that why dad passed away when i was a baby? because that's what your parents did?""no.. no, baby, of course not. our parents didn't want to leave us, and your dad.. sometimes life just gets in the way. it can be really hard sometimes.""is it gonna be hard for me too mama?""i hope not, baby. but you know what? if it ever gets hard, you can always come to me, and we can go through it together. remember.. always remember, that hard times aren't for always, and a life lived with love is lived well. can you do that for me?""yes, mama! i love you!""i love you, too."❁"you look so handsome, dasoyah.""thanks, mom... you're not going to cry, are you?"maybe she is. and what about it? she tuts, waving his accusation off as if she hadn't already cried twice in the morning."i'm just so happy for you, baby. you know -- your father and i met when i was your age. i don't think he would've married me then, though," she chuckles, straightening out her son's tie affectionately. her hands smooth at his shoulders, the corners of her eyes wrinkling with the joy of it all. "you're lucky you found her so young. always remember that."she watches the young couple from her seat, holding hands and looking at each other like they were the only people in the room. gahyeon only cries once, during their vows. what can she say? she's always been a sucker for true love.

i.
"mom, are you ready to go?""this dress doesn't fit the same as it used to... i really miss my boobs...""gross--mom, i love you, but i really don't want to hear that. anyways, you look beautiful!""it's completely natural! i had breast cancer, i am allowed - they used to be your favorite restaurant, you know.""yes -- okay, yes, mom--" he smiles, and she smiles in turn, "i'm sorry. are you ready to go? grandpa said 4 PM sharp." his hand rests on her shoulder, gentle and encouraging. she can hardly believe how big he's gotten when she pats it, letting him help her stand. she knew grounding him until he was five would teach him the importance of punctuality.when they arrive her childhood home is already bursting to the brim with bodies and love, an endless parade of hugs and congratulations handed to her like gifts. she hugs her father, still kind and smiling in his older age, and leaves a kiss at the top of his head. she hugs her son and daughter in law, gentle when she speaks to them about remember -- remember, we must do all things with love. she catches her grandchildren as they run through the garden and into her arms, laughter pulled from her lungs - and what a blessing it is to be given the breath of life.ii.
"mrs. lee, i'm calling to see if you could come in soon. we have an opening at 3 PM today. would that work for you?""what is this about?""i really think we should talk in person. can you come?""....okay. i'll be there."iii.
"the kids are devastated, of course. the oldest two grandkids understand what's going on, but the youngest doesn't quite get it, and that's... hard. haneul and hani were just babies the first time around.. hanah wasn't even alive yet. how do you tell a six year old that you're dying?i've had a good life. i have a beautiful baby boy, who has an incredible wife, and three beautiful grandkids. i was raised by an amazing man. i met the love of my life when i was so young. i've had a great life. everyone around me... they keep saying how unfair this is? to me, unfair is when a kid gets sick. unfair is my husband carrying around pain your whole life. but this? this relapse... this is just life. i have no need or want for anything else.and, if i'm being completely honest... i've been waiting to see you again for far too long."her hand touches the head of his gravestone once more, careful when she leans in to press a kiss against the stone. she smiles, letting the lilies in her hand lean against his name."i'll be seeing you soon, my love."

- arrives at heaven after 71 years on earth
- is Shook when she looks down to see young skin, long black hair, and big boobs. she's pretty sure she had those cut off when she was in her 50s
- absolutely delighted to learn she's assumed the body of her favorite time
- and then completely pissed when she arrives at an empty house
- it's not even the onboarding that tells her -- it's her father, sitting on his porch of what looks to be her childhood home, sighing when he has to share that her late husband isn't in heaven

- she likes their house in limbo a lot better than the one in heaven -- despite the home in heaven being an exact replica of their shared seoul apartment
- everything is better when it's shared with him- "hey, mom?"
- "hmmm~?"
- "why... do we still have to pull weeds?"
- "because your dad usually does, but he's working right now and i want our strawberries to thrive."
- "no - i mean, why do we still have to pull weeds... in the afterlife? aren't there, like, just... strawberries abound? if you want them?"
- she tuts, looking at him with her eyebrows moving and her smile teasing.
- "i taught you better than that, dasoyah. if we just demand the flowers to grow - if we just expect to be given sweet strawberries, then we're taking the entire process of growth for granted. sure, maybe these strawberries won't be as big, or red, maybe they'll be a bit sour. but we take care of them - we grow them with love, and we reap what we sow - the good and the bad. we learn how to grow them better next time. even better after that. we learn from our mistakes, and so do they. no... they'll never be as perfect as the divine-" if she sounds like she's mocking heaven here, it's because she is, "but they'll be the collection of all of our efforts. isn't that beautiful?"
- "yeah. it is."

- another beautiful morning in rest. she collects eggs from the chickens. she cuts flowers and puts them on their table. she makes breakfast. she kisses him goodbye when he leaves for work, then immediately whines and kisses him again.
- "don't go! let's play all day instead!"
- he has to go, she knows. at least she gets another kiss first, watching him as he goes.- another beautiful day in rest, gardening gloves on as she crouches in the dirt
- without even noticing, her body gets lighter, her steps have a bit more buoyancy in them
- it makes crouching around a lot easier
- the scraps she cuts and trims all end up circling around her, naturally pulled into her orbit. all of the plants raise taller to be closer to her
- gahyeon doesn't even bother to put things down when she's done with them, dropping them and trusting that they'll join her pull
- she doesn't even see them coming until they're in her garden, cheshire grins and two steps closer without even ask for permission first
- everything in her orbit falls to the ground - and she's thankful for having already been so close to the ground. less noticeable this way"are you looking for rest?"- they must be lost. please be lost."you'll have to head east to get to the city. there's a path just under 5 kilometers from you - if you follow it, you won't be able to miss the city. i'm happy to give directions and some food for the journey! would you like some waters, too? it's important to hydrate during a long journey -- the sun here is really warm."
"not necessary. we're looking for someone by the name of han... word is he lives here."- she doesn't like the way they look her up and down, how they're sizing her up, checking out their home and assessing."so? you seen him around, gardener?"- she frowns"i'm sorry -- who did you say you were again?"
"we didn't"
"well.... i'm gahyeon! what are your names?"
"friends of han."- as han's best friend, she's slightly insulted that these people have the gall to call themselves his friends
- it's also not what the fuck she asked for"he coming home soon? are you like.. his groundskeeper?"- his head tilts when he says this, starting to smirk. the rest of the crew crowds closer."his girlfriend?"- it's hard not to correct them, biting back the urge
- they take steps closer, and gahyeon takes them back, feeling her weight get lighter
- they walk straight through her daisies, and gahyeon gasps, moving forward"hey! it takes a full year after germinating for those to bloom! apologize to them!"
"is she for real?"
"they're just flowers, little gardener."- there's a scoff among them, and she knows they're judging her but she doesn't care, hurt written all over her face
- someone grabs her arms, dragging her through the flowers, crushing them beyond survival
- gahyeon can't stop watching as it happens. as they trample through the flowers without a care at all, without even thinking about how those are living, too"let go of me, please!"
- her polite complaint is largely ignored
"we'll just have to keep you company while we wait for hannie, hmm? i'm sure he's eager to get home to a pretty little thing like you."
"you're making a huge mistake -- leave him alone!"- because if han catches them here, he'll kill them- gahyeon is sick of this already. she hates these people who showed up unannounced and uninvited. hates that they killed flowers in the garden. hates that they have their hands on her, pulling and tugging her around as if she was just something to do with as they please. hates how close they are to getting inside of her shared home. when she hears one of them talk about how they can show han how to have real fun, she snaps."enough!"- her gravitational circle widens, pushing all of them out of it. two of them are knocked to the ground, the other hit the wall of the cabin
- well. this certainly changes these for their tactics, reassessing the girl whose body seems to be floating just above ground, walking toward them
- and they can feel her gravitational circle pushing at them"i'm going to have to ask you to please leave. now."
"oh, sweetheart... we're not going anywhere. you're too fun."- the problem with using your power so casually so regularly, is that no one ever teaches you how to fight with it
- it's too easy to catch her off guard, to leave her with cuts on her arms as this and that cuts through her orbit with sharp steel
- ...but they underestimate an uncontrolled girl- the next person to charge forward, cocky and stupid, is forced into her orbit, whipping around her body in tight circles before she throws them out
- this happens another two times, and the group has to reassess. again.
- when all of them come for her at once, gahyeon drags them in, pulls them up with her as her circle expands
- she waits until the house looks small, and then lets the weight of her gravity throw them to the ground
- her circle shrinks much slower, and she floats back down to the ground instead of crashing the way she let them
- by the time her feet touch the ground, they're gone- when han returns home, gahyeon has already cleaned and dressed her wounds
- he finds her in the garden, cleaning up the damage done
- she knows he's coming before she even sees him, the scraps in her circle falling to the ground
- she runs to him, arms tight around him in a hug"i have to tell you something."

i.
"why do you think she asks you not to say that?"ii.
"how do you recharge your batteries after caring for han?""i don't understand the question.""i mean, how do you give yourself back some of the energy you give to him?""oh, well, i do lots of things! i garden, and cook, and clean -- i do a lot of reading! oh and i play music after dinner sometimes. on earth i used to do more things in the community, like make mattresses, and blankets. there's.. less of a need for that here.""after you do these things, how do you feel?""it feels really good!""does it feel like you're refiling any of your batteries?""...i don't understand the question.""all of us have our own batteries that need to be recharged. as an example - for myself, i gain energy from comedy, so watching half an hour of stand up will help refill that battery for me. there are things that i do that help my community as well, and while those things are fulfilling, they are also taking energy from me. do you think you know your batteries?""i'm... not sure. that makes sense, but i don't know -- i guess i didn't realize that was something i'd need to consider.""that's okay - why don't you think about until our next session. can you try and identify some of your batteries for next time?""i can do that."